What with Brutal Death Metal being such an intense and powerful genre, one could be easily be fooled into thinking that its musicians were harrowing individuals. However, nothing could be further from the truth as we catch up with Londoners Abhorrent Decimation and Dutch lads Korpse for some light hearted, post show banter…
What’s the most putrid vision you have ever seen on the internet?
Christ. My pal sent me a video the other day on Whatsapp which was a little Colombian Fellow getting shot in the head. There is also a funny one I’ve seen where a woman gets bent over a bench as someone uses a sling shot to fire a conker up her bum.
Who inspires you more musically, Miley Cyrus or Taylor Swift?
I honestly haven’t heard of Taylor Swift before, so I will have to say Miley Cyrus.
Where is the craziest place you have ever had to sleep?
On the last tour with Benighted we had a guy in Leeds who basically had us back to his flat and it was literally a studio flat, his sink was next to his bed, the room was no bigger than 8ft by 8 ft. He had a double bed and all of us were on the floor. We were pretty squashed.
What’s the most brutal way to die, being Devoured by Vermin or Mummified in Barbed Wire?
Mummified in Barbed Wire I reckon.
Tell me about your most violent festival shit?
In an old band we played Obscene Extreme, which is a vegan fest and I didn’t really fancy any if the grub. So we went out of town and got this thing called a “Pharmaceutical Meat Platter” which is basically the bad leftovers of meat. You can imagine the horror that came out the following day.
When is it appropriate to abandon death metal, stick on some Helloween and power on with your hard on?
Again I don’t really like Helloween. If we had some Big Daddy Kane or some Snoop Dogg, I would do that every night.
Why are Abhorrent Decimation the band at NDF 2015 that’s most in touch with their feminine side?
I guess two of us are family men, we have kiddies and we’re married we also have lots of cuddles. We’re a very cuddly band.
Where would you rather live, Fred West’s spare room or Fritzl’s basement?
Fred West’s spare room! I have a warm spot for Fred West’s. He into all sorts as well, like letting other people shag his wife while he watched.
How would Abhorrent Decimation fair in a gang bang?
Yeah I reckon we would be alright!
Who is the worst drinker in the band?
Our drummer Matt, he doesn’t really drink at all. He had about three whiskey and cokes the other night in Edinburgh and was playing everything twice as fast.
Who out of the band is the worst for stinking out the tour bus shitter?
Marten – Oh wow. Probably me!
What three items can you not live without while on tour?
Marten – Three?
Sven- Beer, Oxygen and.
Floor – My Guitar
Sven – If we’re playing Dehumanization the Moustache of Stan.
Whose birthday party would you play for £2million, Justin Beiber’s or Kanye West’s?
Sven – Both for two million quid. We would tolerate the guests for that amount.
What’s the nastiest porn you have every jacked off too?
Sven – We should have our Bassist Mart with us, he could answer that.
Marten – I’m trying to think what he would jack off to, because he would definitely win.
Floor – Probably clown porn.
How would Korpse fair in a Zombie Apocalypse, what’s your survival plan?
Sven – We would head home and drink beer and wait for it all to blow over.
What classic horror villain best describes Korpse?
Marten – I’m not really into horror.
Floor – Definitely the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The original 70’s one of course as it’s pretty brutal.
Who parties the hardest in the band?
All-Mart!
Where’s the best place to crap in an emergency?
Sven – wherever.
Floor – Or your sock. Just whip off one of your socks and go in there.
When is it appropriate to use your bandmates socks to collect your jism?
Sven – Always.
Floor – When they’re still on!
What would you rather eat if these two items were the last remaining things on earth, a used tampon or used bog roll?
Sven – That sounds like a nice dish if you combine both.
Floor – I would go for the toilet roll.
Sven – Use both to make a nice soup for yourself. Although the bog roll is more nutritious.
Marten – Yeah if you’re going on nutrition I would definitely say the bog roll.
(Interviews Eilish Foxen)
Leave a Reply